and this shall be the new portrait

the deli around the corner smells like my gremlins lunchbox... and when i really learn stuff hard... i can taste the air. and both of those things are true... but i can't really explain them any more than just that.

i am tired, and about to go to sleep... to which i find myself excited for, on the grounds that my dreams will yet again prove to the best mental moments of my day.

just the other night, in a dream, i came up with an idea of cutting a pear or a larger fruit in half, emptying out part of the inedible sections... such as the core and/or seeds, and then filling that with a smaller fruit such like a plum nestled e'er so snugly in the middle of a pear. then you simply press the two halves of the pear back together and you get yourself two tiers of crunch and two tiers of flavor.

tiers is a german word, but i knew it long before i knew it was a german word.

also in my dream the other night, i was able to fight an octopus type creature that was growing underneath a carpet expeonentially. it would grow and was for one reason or nother a threat, so in order to keep it small, i had to cut it into grids with a pizza cutter from atop the rug... i don't know how that ties in with the good idea dreams... but i just thought it was neat.

and also, the other night, i swear i came up with the unified theory of matter, and it had something to do with everything existing as different states of sound... but i can not remember in my mere mortal state of awakedness.

i have been noticing that i can ammend certain states of consciousness with the right focus to give me such thoughts or let my random non-thoughts drift as they may... and its  alot of fun... but i usually wind up falling asleep... which is where i want to be anyway... so it works out.

i was thinking today, and though for a long time i didnt want to admit any validity to the advertising world in terms of fine art, i have recently changed my thoughts and now have a greater appreciation for some (mind you SOME) elements of advertising. i have been able to watch the retouching process of still lifes for clinique and burberry and such as of late, and while the content seemed thin at first... i realized there are some beautiful aesthetic decisions being made behind some of these advertising still lifes. and clinique skin lotion bottles and burberry perfumes can be equated to the early renaissance still life. i am not explaining it well now, becuase its late, and my typing head is battling my sleeping will... but i am just saying that i have found aesthetic appreciation in something i once belittled for a long time because i never gave it a chance.

i built walls before i knew what they were blocking. someone recently said that john coltrane was predictable... and i realize, that while everyone has their own oppinion, i think its easy to say that if you haven't REALLY taken the time to know the intricacies and nuances and the journey of a craft. For instance, i could say that ballet is predictable because i know that theres going to be some jumping and lifting and spinning and such... and i could probably guess when such activities might take place within a ballet... but that doesn't mean that i get the scope and reason behind each maneuver.

speaking of jumping... my left calf really hurts today. i wanted you to know that.

tonight, on my 1.5 hour commute home, i sat across from a man whose face i painted 7 years ago in a painting i ammaterishly titled "you're miles off, so what" while this painting was stylized a bit, the characted in the painting was strikingly similar to the character on the R train tonight. which reminded me of my theory that there are only 80 types of heads. all human heads can be broken down, i believe, into 80 categories. now sure, there are differences due to facial fat and hair and color and such, but i strongly am a believer that there exists only 80 types of heads in the world. it became apparent to me  a long time ago when i would travel to places i wouldn't normally frequent, like williamsburg for a family vacation or something, and i'd realize that all these people looked familiar. after that realization, i started trying to figure out who each of these people reminded me of, and realized that there are duplicate faces out there in the world.

now i have never done the scientific research to prove my theory, but i don't need to, i know it to be true indeed.

ok, its 1am and iw ould like to give myself ample time to nap.
i will hopefully write more within the next few days if i can find time.

betweenpicking up don quixote again, guitar lesson practice seeing friends and making a living, i get tired and busy.

until later....

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